Giant Green Glow Worms

The elevator chains rattled and the platform slowly lowered into the mine.  Four miners stood on the platform all thinking about the malfunctioned that sent four of their fellow employees tumbling to their deaths only a week ago.  So this morning the four friends were nervous and didn’t have the capacity to hold a conversation as they were to focused on listening for any sound and looking for any sign that it was there turn to take the ride to the hard ending.

Today was particularly dangerous.  Their job was to unearth a new part of the mine that the drill was unable to get through.  They were given a box of expired dynamite and were told to make it happen by the higher ups.   The platform jerked to a stop and they stared at the dynamite waiting for it to explode but it never happened.

“Dynamite, are they nuts!  It’ll bring the whole fucking mine down” Bob wasted no time in getting his opinion out to the fella’s.

“If you don’t like it quit.  Not much we can do about it.”

“We’re sheep to the slaughter, live with it or go in the unemployment line.”

“Hey anyone know where management offices are?  Maybe we should plant the dynamite under the offices and bring management down to our level.”  Snickered Greg.

“Yeah sure, then we’d be buried down here with them.  Rather stick the dynamite up my ass and light it.”

“Shut up guys.  Screw’em let’s get this over with and hope that if the mine does come down we can get a lawyer and we’ll have our lottery ticket outta’ere.”

“With our luck it will come down on our heads and the company wont pay a cent for death benefits because they will say we violated some imaginary procedure.”

“Guys, shut the fuck up.  Lets just get this done.”

They walked through the mine and planted the dynamite as asked, ran the detonation wire back to the elevator and huddled behind a small wooden skid they turned on its side.

“Yeah this is real safe guys.”  Bob said.

George looked at Bob and started counting.  “3…2…1.” George pressed the detonation button.  The vibration from the explosion knocked the men over as dirt fell in streams from the ceiling.  They all looked up waiting for the ceiling to fall in on them but nothing happened.  The loose dirt slowly came to a stop and their ears rang but they had survived the blast.

“Ah shit.  That was fucking crazy!”  Paul patted his body making sure he all the pieces he walked in with.

“The mine fucking survived!”  Greg said with disbelief.

“So did we you moron.  Let’s go check it out the damage.”

They took the same path back down the mine.  Checking the walls for any weaknesses that might have been caused by the blast.

“Hey does this look okay to you?” Bob asked.

“Bob, you need to look at this.”  Greg grabbed his buddy’s head and turned it in the direction they were looking.  “You seeing what I’m seeing?”

“I don’t know what the fuck I’m looking at.”  Greg said quietly.

“Worms, giant bloody worms.”

“Not bloody…green.”

“Umm, why are they glowing green?”

“Who the fuck knows, maybe they tested nuclear bombs down here.”  Paul said giving his pals the usual sarcastic remark.

“Who gives a fuck what color they are!  I think we should make our way back to the elevator and take the rest of the day off.”

“Fuck yeah.  This is definitely above our pay grade.”

They turned and ran back to the elevator, jumped on and hit the panic button.  The chains rattled and the elevator moved up, but not fast enough.  The giant green worms were moving more then an inch at a time and were catching up to them faster then the elevator moved.

The four of them had their heads up, looking at that speck of light that gradually got larger until they reached the top.  None of them dared to look down they didn’t want to see what was coming up the mine shaft after them.  They pushed and shoved their way off the platform and walked directly into a line of managers.

“Where do you think you ‘re going?”  One of the managers asked.

Greg looked at the manager his was name was Kevin.  Everyone thought he was a real asshole.  “Kevin, I’m sick.  I’m going home.”

“Yea me too!” Paul quickly added

“Me to.” Bob responded.

“I think I have the flu.”  George said while coughing.

All four of the friends left as the line of five managers all out having their smoke break looked at them.  The terminal manger of the mine was about to speak but was cut short as one of the giant green worms exploded from the mineshaft sending dirt and dust in to the air.  The line of managers all turned, their smokes falling from their lips as Kevin was the only one who managed to say anything.  “Oh shit.”  The worm slammed down on to the ground, flattening him and the other managers into puddles of blood, bone, and guts that were dressed in fine suits.

“I hated them all anyways.”  Paul said as he ran as quickly as he could.

“Well they were gonna get it someday, either from a pissed of worker with an AK, or a giant fucking worm.  Who would have guessed it was a giant fucking worm?”

A Chevy Tahoe was parked closest, it was Georges.  He fumbled for his keys and hit the button that unlocked all the doors.  “Guys get the fuck in!”  George said.

They wasted no time, each leaping in.  Before all the doors had closed the engine sparked to life, it was jammed in to gear and the gas pedal was pressed to the floor..

“Hit it George, this is not the time to baby your truck!”

“Go…go…go…go!”

“It’s to the floor boys!”  George yelled.

The worms were getting closer explosions rocked the ground as the three worms flatted everything in their path.

“What are we gonna do?”  Paul asked.

“I’ll tell you want we are gonna do, were going up to my cottage, were gonna go fishing, and wait for the real bad asses to come and take care of this shit.”

“Did you see what happened to management?”  Greg said.  “That was messed up.”

“This whole situation is messed up.”

“That’s why we are going up north, away from this mess.”

The guys didn’t say anything about George’s idea about going up north, probably because they were all looking our the rear window at the chaotic mess that was going on behind them.

Once up at George’s cottage they settled in and were out on the lake fishing before days end.

“Are there any fish in this lake George?”

“Maybe we should have brought some of that expired dynamite with us.  Then we’d be in for a good dinner.”

“Guys this ain’t Crocodile Dundee-“ George was cut off before he could finish.

“Fuck I loved that movie.”

“Yea, me too.  That isn’t a knife.  This is a knife!”

All the men shared in a laugh.

Their was a flash then a bright light that lite the horizon on fire.  The ground shook and a large mushroom cloud could be seen in the sky.

“Oh shit.” Paul said.  “Badasses showed up.”

“More like pressed a button.”  Greg quickly added.

“Would you look at that, ever seen one of those before?”  Bob said watching the blast.

“Do you think we have secret lives Bob?  None of us have seen shit like this before.”  George quickly added.

“Do you think they got the worms?”

“Paul, I don’t know.  If we had…oh I don’t know a radio in that cabin we might be able to find out what’s going on.”

“What do we do?”  Paul asked.  “Should we get inside?

“I think we just stay here and keep fishing.”  The men nodded in agreement with Bob, and cast out their lines enjoying a beautiful nuclear sunset.

 

The End

 

 

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Note On Your Car

It was a long day at work and all I wanted to do was head home, pop open a beer and play some Destiny.  It was the latest triple ‘A’ title released and it was great fun.  I sat in my cubical and spent the last 30 minutes looking up WTF pictures until the clock ticked four and I was a free man.

As my luck would have it the only spot available was at the very end of the parking lot when I arrived earlier in the day.  It was winter, I was cold, and by the time I got to my car I was grumpy.  Unlocking it I got in and let it warm up.  As my windshield slowly defogged I saw a note.  Great had to get out of my warm car, I was not impressed.

Ripping the note from the under the wiper blade I began to read it.  “The World is ending call 843-2632.  We need your help to save the world.”  I looked at the note and laughed. Some asshole co-worker was playing with me because who ever it was found out I liked video games.  I may be 35 but I like gaming so what if I like getting lost in an imaginary world now and then and get to play a hero saving digital worlds.  I tore the note up and tossed it out my window thinking nothing of it.

I arrived home in a pissed off mood and got my beer and went online.  Xbox Live was down.  Great!  I sat there looking at the green and black screen when my apartment building started to shake.  My first thought was I live in Ontario it’s not earthquake central like LA.  I looked out my window and saw a fireball moving though the sky.  “Shit.  I should’ve called that number.”  My cell phone flashed with a text message from 843-2632 it read.  “Asshole”.  I finished my beer with a front row seat to the end of the world.

The End

Suitably Warm

I never really consider the consequences of life when you’re living it.  I was never one for church or repenting of my many sins but I hope that the good things I did in life would out weight the bad.  I couldn’t have been more wrong.  It would seem I did very little good.

On the day of my death I wondered if I would see the light and be whisked away to a beautiful place.  But that was not the case.  I could see my friends standing around me, which were few.  I never married so there were no tears being shed by a grieving widow.  Hell I was only forty years old.  But when my friend pulled the plug on the machine that helped me breath my soul stepped from its body and a strange thing happened.  The world around me faded away.  Like a heavy fog in the early morning it slowly disappeared.  And what surrounded me was an empty space it was like living on a white board.

I walked for what felt like an eternity before I came to a large desk, it reminded me of something you’d find in a courtroom.  Suddenly a large being appeared behind the desk, I jumped in shock not expecting that, thinking a door would open or some being would gently appear.  This creature didn’t look male or female, but it had a bright light swirling around it along with a glow of flames.  I stood there looking up at this giant Omni sexual being.

‘It’s judgment day.’  The voice echoed around the empty space like a song on repeat, never ending.  I couldn’t believe it, I thought judgment day was a joke to scare people in to going to church.  The echoes only ended when the being spoke again.  ‘You have spent only eight hours in church, but the way you lived your life has defined your true character.  Bully in high school and a bully in the work place.  Tell me did you have fun stepping on people in order to get raises and get that seat on the board?  Did you ever consider what you were doing to the other person?’

I just looked at the creature, not sure what to say.  I was surprised that this was happening.  But before I could answer or speak for my good deeds the creature continued.  ‘Let it be noted that the man in question has no reasons for the way he treated people.  I sentence you to the door of horns.’

‘Wait what?  I have something to say.  Please I’m sorry.’

‘Sorry…you sorry?  Those people are sorry their lives destroyed by your actions.  Door of Horns, please enter.’

I shook my head and walked around the desk.  The creature disappeared and I looked at the door of Halo’s, damn I knew where I was going.  Panic started to rise deep with in my eternal soul.  I didn’t want to go to Hell.  I ran to the door of Halos and pulled on the doorknob.  It didn’t budge.

I screamed and yelled to be let in but nothing.  Then the door of horns slammed open and a great wind blew out of it.  The wind was scorching as it swirled around me, I could feel invisible hands clutching at me pulling me.  The invisible wind was dragging me to the door.  I hung on to the doorknob but my grip failed and I flew through the door of Horns hearing it slam behind me.

It was hot and in the shadows I could see things moving.  Screams lit up the surrounding area but I had no idea where they were coming from.  In the distance I could see buildings that were aflame, a sky that shimmered like coals.  A dark shadow against the red horizon was heading my way and I thought to myself hell I wish I had my sunglasses.

 

The End

Don’t Go There

I looked out the window at the fading suns, the reds, blues, and pinks caresses the horizon in a display of color that I have never seen before.  It was fitting considering it maybe one of the last I see on my home world

Against my parent’s wishes I had joined the explorations unit of D.S.E.  I had heard stories of great men and women discovering new races at various stages of evolution, planets that seemed ripe for colonies only to have monsters that would tear you limb from limb and worlds where you’d think no life could exist only to find a thriving metropolises.  The danger that went along with joining the D.S.E I’d like to think was the main reason my parent’s were concern about me join.  The concerns they had didn’t stop me, I wanted a life of adventure, not routine and boredom.

 

At 1700 all the new recruits gathered in the intergalactic map room for orientation and assignments.  A few of my friends had spoken about going to unexplored regions where they would be in deep hibernation on their ships only to wake fifty years later and have only aged a day.  They’d return heroes like the space explorers of years before.  The idea of waking from deep sleep to find that your loved ones had passed on and that the world your loved had change was something I wasn’t sure I’d want to come home to.  If you came home at all.  Deep space missions were the most dangerous kind.

“Hey Giblet, how’s it going?”

I turned and looked over my shoulder and saw Larry and Bob standing behind me.  Giblet was a nickname I gotten in school because I once peed my pants during a Halloween haunted house.  Not my best moment, but I was only five.  I wondered if anyone here knew my real name?  Then again Dick isn’t much better then Giblet…to think of it I’d rather be called Giblet then Dick.  “Good, any idea where they might send you”’

“‘I hope deep space, that’s what I checked off in the survey.”

“I checked off the Helix Galaxy.”  Bob said as he came to stand on the other side of me.

“What did you check off?”  Larry looked at me.

“I check off undecided.”

Larry and Bob passed a quick look of confusion between the two of them.

“What do you mean undecided.  All you talked about when we were kids was going to deep space and becoming a hero.”

“I guess I changed my mind.”  I shrugged.

 

“Attention!”  The chief officer entered the cramped room, with twenty new cadets it was shoulder to shoulder standing room only.  Everyone came to attention and in behind him walked Space Commander Zed.  He was said to have discovered the mining colony Serg that gave us an abundance of Cel-Gel warming coolant for our space engines.

“At ease fella’s.”  He looked around the room eyeing everyone.  When he met my eyes I felt a shiver flow through me.  “Well right here I have all your assignments.”  He tapped his finger against a v-log.  “Some of you will be very happy but in here is a classified long term assignment.  Before we get in to assigned duties, I need a volunteer for this long term off planet integration assignment.”  He looked around the room at everyone, probably trying to see who might raise their hand, but no one was jumping to accept it.  Integration missions were long term sometimes life sentences and that wasn’t for everyone.

“Okay you need more information huh.  I can tell you this assignment has a life span of 30 years, you will assimilate in to the culture, and you will try to prevent an all-out extinction of the planet by influencing it through new discoveries.  Of course this discoveries will simply be the invention of technology that we already have but used to bring a fractured world together.”

“A babysitting assignment!”  Someone yelled out in disappointment.

‘Who said that!’  The Chief looked around annoyed and ready to hang someone.

“It’s alright chief.  We believe that the planet Earth is worth saving.  They have come a long way but with world destruction looming and the great wars that consumed many countries, they require leadership, and we need someone here to help guide them.”

Bob leaned over and whispered loud enough that Larry and I could hear.  “Who would want that job?  I don’t want to go there, not to that brown shit ball of a planet.  Hell it will probably implode before whoever decided to do this gets there.”

“This will also grant you early retirement after your return to your home world after the thirty years.  So before I pick someone anyone want to volunteer?”

I looked at Bob and Larry, they look around wondering who would be dumb enough to take it.  “I’ll do it sir!”  I yelled out.  Bob and Larry looked at me in shock.

“What’s your name?”

“Private Dick Space sir.”

“Will Mr. Dick Space, the job is yours.  Come get your itinerary.”

I stepped forward and took the v-log and looked down at it.  On the screen in big bold red letters is said Confidential.

“I suggest you leave Dick Space, you have a long journey to pack for and some reading to do.”  Zed looked to the Chief.  “Show him to his new quarters where he will be staying until mission goes active.”

“Yes sir.”  Chief said.

I turned my head and looked over my shoulder at Bob and Larry who were still wide eyed as they watched me leave.  I still wasn’t sure how I felt about them, but maybe on Earth I’d meet someone else and make new friends.  Maybe even end up saving a planet.  One thing I did know is that on Earth I could be anyone I wanted to be.

 

The End

February 9, 2015

 

Glossary

D.S.E – Deep Space Exploration